It’s all too common these days for women to be afraid of giving birth.
Nervous, anxious, worried, uncertain.
When I ask women how they feel about giving birth, these are frequently the words that they use.
But it’s not how they want to feel.
They want to feel relaxed, confident, excited and look forward to the birth so they can sit back and enjoy their pregnancy.
I passionately believe that no women should have to feel terrified about giving birth and yet I hear YOU and all the other women that feel that fear because this was me too.
I trained to teach Hypnobirthing because know how POWERFUL it can be. I want to share my story so you can understand it too.
I don’t know where my fear of childbirth came from. I hadn’t given birth so I had nothing to compare it too. I know for me it was a combination of two things, fear of the unknown and fear of the pain
What about that pain, the ‘AGONY’ of childbirth.
“It looks to me like getting cut in half with a chainsaw”
“No that’s not for me. I can’t even handle stubbing my toe, hell I even cry when I get a bikini wax, I will never cope with giving birth “
“I want kids, I want a family but I don’t want to give birth, you will have to cut my baby out, I don’t care how”
Whenever we would have a girly get together and the subject turned to babies and birth these are the kind of things I would say.
Any of this sounds familiar?
And then, I got pregnant.
Classic happy accident. My partner and I weren’t even living in the same city at this point. Ooops!
The first few months passed in a bit of a daze, it all didn’t start to feel real until the first scan.
Then came the kicks, then comes the belly, then the gender reveal.
It’s a boy, a real-life human in there, not just a jelly baby.
SHITS about to get real.
What the hell was I going to do?
There had to be another way.
I frantically googled.
Private c section…20k for a no-frills version, so that was off the cards.
Doula….hmmmm sounds interesting makes mental note to revisit.
Pain-free birth…Hypnobirthing? Hmmm can help with the pain, no guarantees but this sounds interesting. I googled more. I liked what I heard.
We had skirted around the issue of my partner actually being at the pub and me birthing solo at this point so I needed all the help I could get.
At the time none of my friends had used it so we kind of went into it without expectation. We booked onto a course but due to a work trip very late in my pregnancy, I was 33 weeks pregnant when we started the sessions.
When we finally got to took the Hypnobirthing course. It was like a lightbulb moment for both of us
I was worried about a long and painful labour and the irony was if I didn’t tackle this fear then it could increase my chances of having a long, and painful labour.
This was powerful shit.
I read, I practiced, I listened, I read some more, I did the homework, watched the videos. I crammed like it was the most important exam of my life.
I left feeling empowered, informed, excited and truth be told we had both done a complete 360 in how we felt about birth. I was actually looking forward to the big day and so was my partner – he even suggested a homebirth.
It was a complete transformation
The day came and went and. I will spare you the details, that’s a whole other blog. But we came out the other side having had a very positive birth experience.
Did it go 100 percent to plan?
No, but we were ready for that. The power of the plan was knowing that I had OPTIONS and being able to make informed decisions about my care when the inevitable twists and turns of the labour unfolded.
Did I have a pain free birth?
Well, given the option of giving birth again or having a 17-hour bikini wax. I would choose BIRTH BIRTH, BIRTH! And the only tears were that magical moment when I held my baby in my arms for the first time and cried. I DID IT!
Now someone please get me a glass of fizz!
Did my partner end up at the pub?
Hell no, he was an AMAZING support and right down there at the business end to see the birth of his son! Hypnobirthing was just as powerful for him as it was for me and there is so much practical advice for birth partners that want to support their baby Mamas.
It was only a few months after the birth that I thought about Hypnobirthing. I actually had what I think they call an epiphany.
It woke me up in middle of the night and told me that’s what I needed to do.
It was like a calling to help other women and their partners prepare for a more positive birth experience.
If you are one of the women reading this who feels nervous, anxious or scared of giving birth then I would love to help you change how you feel about birth too.
I hold regular free taster classes in Walthamstow for anyone who wants to get 60 free whole minutes of hypnobirthing before booking a course.