I wanted to talk today about the birth plan AND the biggest ‘mistake’ people make when it comes to writing one…or perhaps even something that holds them back from writing a birth plan in the first place.
It’s likely during pregnancy you will hear many stories from friends of “the birth plan going out of the window on the day” and yes, if there is one thing you can’t predict, it’s how a birth will unfold.
So if birth is unpredictable at best, and so many plans go out the window, why even bother writing one in the first place?
I hear a lot of people now saying they don’t have a plan and they want to just go with the flow.
Whilst I agree that it’s great to approach birth with an open mind of how things could play out on the day….
I do think a birth plan is a MUST have.
Firstly It’s your primary way of communicating your wishes with your care providers on the day which you might think would be a breeze but your brain waves actually change when you are giving birth, in order for you to get to the ‘ birth zone’.
The thinking and decision making part of your brain needs to kinda deactivate a little bit. So avoiding unnecessary communication and decisions helps you to work WITH your body. IE less talk more action!
Secondly, it helps your birth partner and anyone else on your birth team act as an advocate on the day as they have all of your wishes on paper. It helps you all work together as a team, making their lives easier too.
The power of the plan
So often, something comes up in conversation at Hypnobirthing classes and one of our clients will say ‘ahhhhhh I didn’t even know you could do that!
For example, you don’t have to have vaginal exams or a sweep if you won’t want them
That’s where the power is.
That’s how you go from feeling out of control to feeling empowered
When you realise that YOU get to choose.
It’s a total lightbulb moment for many and really helps you to feel in the driving seat.
The biggest mistake when it comes to writing a birth plan
The biggest mistake is in people not realising that the ‘work’ is done before you write the plan. In fact, the power of the plan is NOT in the plan itself, it’s the process of you becoming informed as you research all the many choices available to you. It’s that simple.
How exactly DO you plan for birth?
Focus your energy on researching. As the saying goes you don’t know what you don’t know.
Be curious. Ask questions, read lots of other birth plans for inspiration. Visit the hospital or birth centre.
I am a massive fan of the positive birth cards that accompany the positive book. Think of it like top trumps for birth cards.
The pitfalls of a birth plan….
The only pitfall of a birth plan is If you see the plan as rigid, or how it must play out then you leave yourself open to disappointment. There needs to be a bit of flex in there.
If you think you not sticking to the plan somehow means failure, then repeat after me.
I cannot fuck this up.
Something not going to plan is NOT your fault in ANY way shape or form. And neither is you changing your mind about what you want.
One of the most empowering things you can do on the day is to change your mind and to totally own it!
If you want to take back the power when it comes to birth and learn tools to help you feel way more in control then lets chat!
We run regular Hypnobirthing courses in Walthamstow, Leyton, and Islington. Weekends, evenings, we even offer 121 courses from your SOFA! All designed to take you from busy to baby.
Click here for more info